Baby Name.....

Caleb and I are now deadlocked at two names. One is his idea, one is mine. So hard when you want to be giving, but this decision is sooooo important!

So....I created a new poll. I don't want to mention our baby names because that would be ridiculous and not nice, but you can choose who you trust to pick the name the most: me or Caleb. Bahhahaahahaha

It's a Boy!!

What a DAY.

When I woke up, the sun was shining, the grass was glistening, and the air smelled like spring. I went into work and the students at Aveda wore pink or blue today based on what they thought the gender of the baby was going to be, which was so fun. Totally meant to take a picture to document it, sorry Little Baby. You and I got a lot of love today, though, trust me.

For those of you who don't know, despite my normally calm exterior, my nerves and anxiety can hit all time highs on days such as these. I become CRAZY. And that is exactly what happened. My mind was racing...boy....girl....make sure you drink enough water....boy.....girl....am I drinking too much water.....boy...girl.....which one is it?! I suck at focusing on work or other people and become completely self-involved (my apologies everyone). Minutes tick by. Life slows. And for these brief times when I devolve into madness, I need to be checked into a mental hospital.

Finally around noon, Caleb picked me up for the appointment. I was a chatterbox and was annoying even myself. Five minutes into the car ride, Caleb goes, "Turn this way so I can slap you." To which I responded with an obnoxious laugh and more inane babble.

And finally.......The Ultrasound. Seeing Little Baby J in perfectly cute baby form for the first time was fantastic. Anxiety went out the window in a flash. This baby is just perfect. As the ultrasound tech took snapshots and documented various body parts on the screen, I would comment, "Oh! Two legs! That's a good thing!" and she would laugh and say "Yes, that is a very good thing.". "Oh! Such a nicely shaped head! Good job, Baby J!" She made measurements for a good 20 minutes before asking if we wanted to know the gender. When she said it was a boy, Caleb VERY AUDIBLY said, "YESSSSSSS!!!". We truly were happy either way, but we are thrilled to have a little boy.

Telling everyone has been a great joy, and I sooooo appreciate all of the love and support. I am so thankful for this beautiful pregnancy; my hopes had been hurt so badly by the previous pregnancy that my joy is so incredibly strong for this healthy, perfect little one.

"Of all the animals, the boy is the most unmanageable." ~Plato

I can hardly wait :).

Patience is a Virtue

Holy crap, I can't stand waiting for Friday!!! This week is taking foooorever. And you know what is really obnoxious? Every time I use the word Friday, I think of Rebecca Black. So every time I am impatient and think about the ultrasound, "Friday" plays like a faint theme song in the background of my mind. NOT the song you want stuck in your head when you are already annoyed.

I need to calm down and appreciate every moment of this wonderful thing that is happening. Of this "calm before the storm". I need to remember that when I am finally holding the baby in my arms, part of me is going to miss the time when I carried the baby everywhere I went and could feel it's every movement. I need to live in THIS moment.

I feel calmer already. This blog thing is such a good idea.

"Knowing trees, I understand the meaning of patience. Knowing grass, I can appreciate persistence." ~Hal Borland

19 Weeks - Happy Heartbeat

We had our 19 week appointment today. I LOVE these appointments, because they are the greatest reassurance that everything is going well. When the nurse listened to the heartbeat, it was steady and fast, at 161bpm. She had no trouble finding it, it just started the second she put the heartbeat-measuring-thing on my tummy. It is a very cool sound.

The doctor checked me and said everything was perfect and if I didn't have any issues, then I was free to go. Having gone through last year and the miscarriage, it continues to astonish me that you can have these great doctor's appointments where everything goes perfectly. At this point in the pregnancy, I am very reassured that everything is fine and I rarely stress anymore. Even though I am not worried anymore, I still end up flying high as a kite after every perfect appointment.

Caleb and I spent the weekend at his sister and brother-in-law's house down in Gilman, IL. It was a great weekend of fun and relaxation. Baby and I went to our first drive-in movie, which was a highlight of my life. I took the best bubble bath in the world (bubbles everywhere!) and had a great grill-out with Alissa and Dave's family. Little Baby J continued to make it's presence known more and more...kicking, squirming, moving, etc. Caleb still can't feel it yet, but this baby is getting stronger and stronger, he should be able to feel it soon.

One and half more weeks until "The Ultrasound". According to the poll, there are a lot of you thinking Little Baby J is a little baby boy. A few proudly think it's a little baby girl. I can tell you that at this point, I am so excited for either one that I might be a little disappointed either way!! :) We found some great girl names this weekend, so we finally have some good names lined up for however this ultrasound turns out.

This is sooooooooooooooooo much fun now!! I am so glad this pregnancy became fun!!!

18 Weeks- Feeling Great!

I am finally at the point in this pregnancy where I am not crazy impatient or ridiculously worried. I feel very healthy, have fairly insignificant symptoms, and am finally showing. From here on out, I think I will be able to enjoy this pregnancy without too much fear.

While showing has been exciting and fun for me, the best moment came while Caleb and I were watching an old 90's TV mini-series called The Stand. Halfway through watching this ridiculous excuse of a show, Little Baby J tapped me four times to let me know "I'm here! Pay attention to me!". Since then, I have been patiently but fervently waiting for each and every little tap. Every day, they seem to get a little bit stronger. It is so amazing to me that even days can add so much strength to this baby. Now I can tell a little better when Little Baby J is moving, and I felt my first kick yesterday. Still gentle, nothing startling, but a little kick nonetheless.

I was telling a friend that I have always thought that pregnancy seemed kind of magical but really creepy. A person growing inside a person. So I always expected that feeling the baby moving would be awesome but would also freak me out. For all of you out there creeped out by the idea, I am here to say that it has been anything but creepy. It is a wonderfully gentle little reminder that your baby is safe and happy. I just adore it.

Two weeks until we can find out what gender the baby is! I can't wait!!! If you haven't voted in my poll, please do! I really really want to know what everyone is thinking :).